6 minutes
Research shows the quality of the connection you have with your therapist is the most important factor in how successful therapy is for you. That's why it's important to start therapy with someone who you click with.
When you are choosing a therapist, it can help to look for someone who:
Finding the right person can take a little bit of trial and error. A referral from your GP, or a recommendation from a friend or family member, can be a helpful place to start. But it is still worth doing your own research, because the therapist who is right for someone else may not be the right fit for you.
This guide can help you work through the practical steps: where to look, what to consider when shortlisting therapists, what questions to ask before booking, and signs it may be worth continuing your search.
If you are not sure where to start, these steps can help you narrow your options.
A GP can talk with you about what you are going through and potentially help you get a Mental Health Care Plan, so you can access rebates for sessions with mental health professionals. Your GP may also suggest a therapist they know or have referred other people to.
They can also check for any underlying physical health issues that might be affecting how you feel. These could be things you might not have connected to your mental health, like a thyroid issue, low iron or a vitamin D deficiency.
The Australian Psychological Society has a 'Find a Psychologist' tool online that allows you to search their directory of practitioners by issues and location. If you're unsure what you'd like help with, consider starting your search by location and filtering the list. You can also try searching for free or low-cost psychologists using our Service Finder.
Try phrases such as these on search engines like Google:
If you feel like you have many different options, look at practical details such as location, telehealth availability, fees, Medicare rebates, wait times and appointment times. It can also help to consider personal, social or cultural fit, such as whether the therapist describes themselves as LGBTIQ+ inclusive, trauma-informed, culturally responsive, or experienced with your age group or life stage.
Therapy centre websites often list several practitioners in one place, which can make it easier to compare experience, approach, cost and availability.
Once you have a shortlist, consider calling or emailing a few therapists before booking. You can briefly explain what you would like help with and ask questions such as:
You do not need to choose someone on the spot. If the conversation does not feel right, keep looking.
From time-to-time, you may also experience that a psychologist you contact replies that they don't have any availability. In these cases, it can be helpful to ask them about other therapists in your area they'd recommend.
When choosing your therapist, it can be helpful to think of the attributes you would like in your therapist. Everyone is different, but many people say they’re looking for a therapist who is:
You might also think about how you feel when you talk to them. It's a good sign if you feel:
'At our first session together, she repeatedly spoke of how our sessions would be a safe, judgment free space.'
Keep in mind that, like any other relationship, the bond between you and your therapist strengthens over time, so it can be useful to keep reflecting on the relationship with your therapist after each session.
The most important thing to consider when finding a therapist is how comfortable will you feel with this person? Can you get a sense of their personality from what they've written about themselves? Remember to also look at the areas they specialise in (e.g. depression, relationships) to see if they have experience in the area you need.
It’s important to trust your gut. If at first glance you don't think you'd get along with someone - maybe they remind you of an old school teacher or partner you had issues with - feel free to pass and keep searching for someone you feel comfortable with from the get-go.
Once you've narrowed it down to a few therapists, it's a good idea to reach out to them for a quick chat. This is a perfectly normal thing to do. It can help you get a better idea of the real person behind the online profile and ask any questions you might have. It can also save you the frustration and cost of going to your first therapy session and only then finding out that you don’t feel comfortable talking to them.
For many therapists, this will be common practice and something they'll be more than happy to do for you.
Therapists normally conduct back-to-back appointments and might not be able to chat the first time you call. Instead, leave a message and ask them to call you back when they can. If you don't feel up to calling, consider sending them an email with a few of your questions.
When you connect with a therapist it would be helpful to share a bit of your background, the specific issues you’d like help with and your goals for attending therapy.
It's also a good time to ask them any questions you have about their way of working, and them as a person and therapist.
You might consider asking them:
If you don't like how things went on the call, maybe your gut is telling you something. Be open to continuing to look around. You don't need to make a decision on the spot. You can thank the therapist for the chat and let them know you'll have a think and be in touch.
Putting in this little bit of effort before your first session helps to screen your potential therapists and can help you find someone you can build a strong relationship with.
When choosing a therapist, you're choosing someone to be on your team. So they need to be someone you can trust and someone you can talk, learn and grow with.
If you don't feel comfortable and understood or are not able to connect with your therapist, your chances of achieving a positive outcome from therapy are significantly lower. Without honesty and openness, your therapist will have a really hard time figuring out how best to help you achieve your goals.
Remember, therapy is a two-way street. When you feel comfortable sharing your thoughts and feelings with your therapist, they'll have a better chance of being able to help you.
After your first or second session, you're probably going to have some idea of whether you 'click' with your therapist.
At this stage, it’s important to trust your gut. If, for whatever reason, you get the wrong feeling from them, then it's more than okay to not return for another session and instead find someone else who may be a better option.
This is a very normal part of finding the right therapist. So it's important that you don't view this as a problem with you, a problem with your therapist, or a problem with therapy.
Just like finding a best friend or a life partner, the person you're going to connect with is unique to you, and finding that person may take some trial and error.
By taking the time and that little bit of extra effort to find the right therapist, you’re setting yourself up to achieve the best possible result.
Keep in mind that if you decide to move to a new therapist, you may need a new referral from your GP, but you can transfer your Mental Health Treatment Plan if you have one.
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